75% posts

ASOS 75% Off Sale Picks.

January 2, 2014

Despite my bank balance currently screaming over-overdrawn at me, I couldn’t help myself from having at least a masochistic peek at the up-to-75% off sale running at ASOS at the moment – and now I want to cry. Wouldn’t it be nice if you could cry pennies? Painful, but $$$$. However, I decided to live vicariously through you guys and give you a quick rundown of some of the delightful pieces they have to offer at the moment. Don’t worry about me, I’ll just be here – in my dressing gown, crying into my camomile tea. Currently on Day 2 of ‘Veganuary’ and not smoking, going strong and looking forward to trying out the Vegan options at Tampopo later at the Trafford Centre. Going to get my consumer fix by trading in 5 empty Lush pots for a facemask, mwahaha. Anyway, back to the subject – here are my sale picks:

  • Daisy Street Crop Top with Polo Neck – Was £9.99, now £6.50

Unsure whether my infatuation with this style of shirt lies with the product itself, or my burgeoning jealousy for that model’s torso – can I buy that, too? Either way, I love how this shirt manages to flip off the prudish stigma behind polo/turtle necks (three words: Velma – Scooby Doo) with its cheeky midriff cut. Easy to style, I’ll have it in both red and black please.

  • ASOS Skater Dress in Check – Was £42, now £21

Cannot get my head around the juxtaposition of preppy and grunge with this one, but I think that’s the appeal. Team with a chunky waist-cincher belt, black platform boots and a black fedora. And a coat: just because Father Christmas has been and New Year has gone, doesn’t mean you should opt for Pneumoniary (that’s pneumonia + January… worked out better in my head).

  • ASOS Pencil Skirt with Bold Braces – Was £40, now £24

You can be the bawzzz with this form-fitting bold pencil skirt. Perfect piece for an office-to-evening switch: just wear with a dress shirt during the day, sneakily strip off in the loos and replace with a graphic shirt – preferably with something alluding to how fabulaaarse you are (don’t – those shirts make you look like a bit of a nob).

  • ASOS PREMIUM Affliction Leather Ankle Boots – Was £85, now £42.50 

asosboots

Hamlet asked: “To be or not to be?”, Ebony asked: “Why the sweet mother of fudge aren’t these boots on my feet?”. Arguably somewhat less of a pressing matter – I think shoe lust is trumped by suicide contemplation, but I’m still not convinced… I would team these with: everything. Forever and ever Amen.

Products linked via product images.

Ark’s Ridiculous Sale Picks.

December 31, 2013

Well played Ark, I wrote this post primarily because I wanted that bangin’ gif on my blog – just look at that little marvel. Given I have a cracking total of £16 whole pounds in my account, I should really put this under my ‘Pipe-dreamin’ posts, but with the prices this cheap: I could technically afford something! The sale is MASSIVE – arguably larger than Nicki Minaj’s arse, but I’ll leave that for you to decide. So, whilst I carry on with my virtual copywriting mountain, I’ll leave you guys to check these sales out and hopefully shop vicariously through you. Here are my favourite picks:

  • Hearts & Bows Plum Bower Space Dye Cropped Knit (try saying that in one breath…) – was £18.99: now £12

Given everything I’ve bought recently, aside from my nip-tastic red dress, has been blackblackblack. There’s nothing like a good staple piece, so snapping up this throw-together-with-everything piece would be grand. I’d team with an Empty Casket necklace, black platform boots and a kimono.

  • Vero Moda Green Puca Sequin Mini Skirt – was £25.99: now £12

I’m sorry Mr/Miss Ark Stylist, but I’m not with you on this outfit combination one iota – however, I am lusting over that shiny little number. Nothing better that channelling a bit of a slutty Little Mermaid vibe, right? I’d stick with a white graphic shirt and leather jacket, or just black-on-black-on-black. Who’s with me?

  • Vila Black Kindra Military Coat – Was £54.99: now £35

Bargain of the year award goes to…! This is so cheap and yet tasteful looking, that I am very tempted to sack off my New Year plans – simply to stand around Wigan town centre handing these out to underdressed 17-year-olds on King Street. Timeless and pneumonia-free. And a great shield for you to throw over any poor, misguided lass wearing womb-shorts (you know which ones I mean, right?).

  • Hearts & Bows Floral Horilen Devore Velvet Kimono – Was £37.99: now £20

I’d write something meaningful, but the velvet has taken me. This one needs no explanation whatsoever – aside from the explanation of why you haven’t bought one yet.


Ebony. 25. Manchester.
Marketing Manager who likes to mouth off on here about stuff she cares about. Expect mental health, Borderline Personality Disorder, and reviews - from restaurants, to books, to fashion. Talks to cats more than people, but seemingly has a lot to say.
ebonylaurenn@gmail.com